I’ve invented the thermometer.

I’ll call freezing point of water 32 degrees.

Friend: what?

And the boiling point will be 212 degrees.

Friend: why?

Cause the freezing point and boiling points are opposite, so 180 degrees apart.

Friend: okay…. why not have the freezing point as zero?

Cause I used zero for a brine solution, not pure water.

Friend: so shouldn’t 212 degrees be the boiling point of brine then?

I’m Batman.