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Onion: Breaking News

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Racer X3/09/2010 7:16:25 pm PST

re: #130 Killgore Trout

He’s doing fine. Don’t fret.

I dunno about that. I see way too many missteps. The one that peeved me the most was when he recently made comments about evil greedy capitalist companies going to Las Vegas to party. What happened next? Hotel and convention bookings DRIED UP.

Thanks for guaranteeing Harry Reed gets voted out!

Contrast that to right after 9/11 and the country really truly looked to be in deep shit. Not one airplane in the air. Not one. And Bush told everyone to relax, go spend some money and lets show these assholes what we’re made of.

Confidence.